#MEGXIT A Very British Fairy Tale

Life Beyond The Kitchen Sink

Once upon a time there was a tiny island surrounded by blue.

The Kingdom was a proud Kingdom- ruled by a Queen.

The inhabitants dwelled in a golden time of yesteryear and never was.

The Nation prided itself on a heroic past where the Sun never set. Their identify easily identified by their desired homogeneity.

For the love of their Kingdom they loved their Queen. And although her name and blood descended from foreign lands, her skin was as pale as the powder puff clouds that often covered the sky of the little island. So the privilege of belonging to the Great Nation was bestowed upon her crown.

Many years passed and the beloved Queen married her third cousin from lands a far.

She bore four doting children of mixed blood but all graced with skin as translucent as the drops of rain that fell from the grey sky.

Three Princes the Queen did birth.

Princes full of love.

Oh how the Second Prince loved young girls! How he would spend hours on end in the company of damsels- oblivious to their distress. Feasting on golden platters of Sloppy Giuseppes without even breaking a sweat! He was beloved by his Queen and his country. The trumpets declared: a jester he may be at times but his heart was as pure as his delicate but slightly clammy skin.

Oh and the King to be!

So full of love that whispers often caressed the breeze with tales of how the eldest Prince did love the household staff.

So stoicicly loyal to his Sweetheart that he remained faithful even when faced with the misfortune of being married to Another.

Another, guilty of being the Prince’s choice of Queen Not, received a royal pardon by way of two dashing sons to capture the heart of the nation.

Once again the Queen smiled upon the continuation of her House. Two Grand sons both of pale nature-only hair colour to tell them apart.

But all was not well in the Kingdom! The young Princes’ mother would not socialise within the guilded box her royal status bequeathed. No longer silenced by her crown, she danced on Dark Sands in Tarnished Lands.

The Kingdom was in uproar!

A blood thirsty pack was set upon her. In a dark tunnel in a land across the sea she perished- living her little Princes adorned in black.

Time passed and the people forgot. The young Princes grew strong and handsome. They too found love.

The Prince Who Would Be King, set about the duty of presenting to the Kingdom a future queen to make the Nation proud.

A fairy tale. The Prince who married a pauper (by millionaire standards) The future Queen- a Snow White of their very own. The people cheered. She was beautiful! They were proud!

Alas, the younger Prince followed not in his brother’s foot steps. He danced on the same dark sands as his mother had. In a foreign land he met his own Queen of Hearts.

The bugles sounded! The people had been betrayed! It was incredulous that their handsome Prince would choose her over the fairest in all the land.

How dare their prince soil their nation with a tarnished love. It was as simple as black and white. The Prince’s Queen could never truly belong!

The angry pack despised the Young Prince’s Queen just as they had despised his mother. She could no right.

And so she was hounded, even as her unborn child sought refuge behind her navel, she was hounded.

Day after night, night after day, on digital platforms and front covers spread, the couple were harrassed.

The Queen continued to rule the waves but remained silent.

Then on a grey, overcast day, the young couple planned an escape!

They would surrender all heirs and graces and retreat to welcoming lands a far.

But the crowds jeered.

The Queen voiced her dismay at the young couple’s desire to abandon their Great Nation.

Still the couple could do no right!

But fear not! The young couple realised that the Kindgom was founded on institionalised racism thus would never be satisfied with a royal member who glowed with a “funny tinge”.

Thus from that day forward, it was decided by the Banished Pair that the haters and hate spreaders of the land could go and truly F&£k themselves.

Merrily the they left the tiny island surrounded by blue and lived happily ever after.

The End.

Movie in cinemas soon.

I’m just not buying it

Nursery

I’ve decided I would like to rellocate to wherever the people defending H&M are from.
I’ve read comment after comment across social media by people stating they do not understand why people are getting so offended.

What a blissful existence they must have, to have never been exposed to the racist use of the word monkey.

I’d love my son to grow up in a place where black sports stars don’t have bananas thrown at them by the crowd or placed in their lockers by team mates.  Or basketball stars are compared to King Kong on the cover of fashion magazines.

A place where no one asks “Where’s your tail?” Or lets “f*&ing Monkey! ” slip during a heated exchange.  Or a child of colour is surrounded by peers in the play ground making monkey noises.

A utopia where history was not rewritten to depict native Africans as infantile savages needing supervision by European invaders.

So please H&M defenders, reach out and let me know where you all live.. I’m sure you’d welcome me as your new neighbour- wouldn’t you?

X https://youtu.be/epEQhxslprE