Probably a surprising title for a review of #wakanderforever but then again- I’m not really writing a review but an observation.
In our Western Society grief, loss and mourning are taboo words (unless of course a member of the monarchy dies). We are told to rush ahead, distract ourselves, buy things, fuck things – whatever to numb pain instead of processing it.
That’s why I loved Wakanda Forever because they said “We are mourning our brother. Chadwick Boseman was more than just a character he was our friend and we will not just carry on as if nothing has happened.”
Over the past couple of decades, we have lost many loved ones through global pandemics, climate change, prejudice and poverty. We have lost freedoms, our voices and to some extent our hope.
We have not been allowed to grieve these profound loses- because if we did- we would realise how much we have lost. When we do not grieve and process our emotions we often misname them. How often do we call sadness anger? or frustration or confusion? We are limiting our range of emotions to extremes or nothing at all.
We are learning to identify childhood traumas yet ignore the trauma of surviving in a society where there is a Cost of Living. Living in a society where the violence of that phrase isn’t even noticed.
But things are changing. We are becoming courageous enough to grieve! We are becoming curious enough to challenge and examine state endorsed grief and the control over what we mourn.
Over the Remembrance Weekend, I reclaimed my mourning. I chose to wear a white poppy next to my black poppy.
White poppies stand for three things.
- Remembrance of all victims of war, including both civilians and members of the armed forces. People of all nationalities. People killed in wars happening now, as well as in the past. People who are often excluded from the mainstream, such as refugees and victims of colonial conflicts.
- Challenging war and militarism, as well as any attempt to glorify or celebrate war. White poppies question the way war is normalised and justified. They remind us of the need to resist war and its causes today.
- A commitment to peace and to seeking nonviolent solutions to conflict. By drawing attention to the devastating human cost of war, white poppies highlight the urgency of our ongoing struggle for peace.
We assume that grief leads to sadness, I choose to believe that it leads to peace xx
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